Not Me! Monday in Numbers

It's about that time again! Welcome to Not Me! Monday! This blog carnival was created by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week (Except, she is taking a week off this week.)

This is a summary of how my week did NOT go (in numbers):

78887 - the number of miles my car did NOT reach

I did NOT clean and destroy my kitchen exactly 6 times this week

2 - totally successful attempts at curling my hair

19.98 - how many dollars I supposedly owe the Crunchless Abs company (story/rant to come!), even though they did NOT charge me 26.98 on that same day!

2484928 - number of telemarketers who have NOT received my personal info (including cc#) from Crunchless Abs

I did NOT take a 3 hour nap today while JT worked on the garden by himself

My husband did NOT ask me to make more than 24 zucchini crisps for our church potluck today. And even if he did, I would have made more instead of saying no one will eat them anyway. That way, I would have been perfectly sure he got to try them instead of finding an empty plate when it was his turn to go through

0 - Speaking of JT, he would NEVER send me to Lowes, and even on the slight chance that he did, it would not be yielding a parasite-infested plant. No ma'am! My JT would never subject his wife to wandering around a foreign planet carrying a bouquet of leaves with little white creatures crawling on them. And I most certainly WOULDN'T Twitter about it being comparable to a wife sending her husband on a journey to the mall for red shoes. NO, I did NOT!

I did NOT finish 1 book this week and predict the ending. Even if I did predict the ending, I certainly would NOT be shocked in spite of myself! (Has anybody NOT read Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult? Can anyone NOT commiserate with me?)

48 - the floor on which my company DOESN'T office

I did NOT set up an interview to potentially hire 1 woman, who did NOT arrange to come to our offices at 3:00, only to NOT send me this email: "Dear LB, I would love to meet at 3:00; however, I have a problem: I am terribly afraid of heights and cannot ride the elevator. Can you meet me in the lobby?"

???

Seriously??

If I had gotten such an email, I would NOT have forwarded it to 934093 people. I would have politely responded, "We are currently hiring for an in-house position. Please contact us in a few months as we may have relocated by then," and left it at that.

Well there you have it, friends! What have you been NOT doing lately?